Last year, I wrote a lot about our finances and budgeting and groceries. I was reading a lot of blogs about those subjects. It was somewhat consuming. I've decided to stop obsessing. We still do a cash budget for some things because it helps me stay accountable. There are times, however, that I do go over budget. And it's no big deal. We live within our means, we save up for purchases, we limit miscellaneous spending. We don't budget each month to the dollar. We don't keep track of how we spend every dollar. We do keep our checking account balanced and we do allow for extra expenses. We have made mistakes but we've learned from those and we're trying to not repeat them.
And you know what? It's been quite freeing. I've given myself permission to do what works for us and to stop trying to do what works for everyone else. Some lessons just take awhile to learn.
Friday, September 17, 2010
Wednesday, September 15, 2010
Finding the balance
Although I love that we homeschool, there are things I miss.
I have lamented the fact that I don't get a parent-teacher conference with my kids. I am both the parent and the teacher so I don't get a pat on the back or hear what my child needs to work on; I only have my opinion to go by and frankly, I'm biased. Although I think sometimes I'm even more critical than a teacher would be.
I've also lamented the fact that my kids don't get to tell me about their day. I'm there with them. They don't get to bring home papers or art projects to show me.
But this year - we joined our local homeschool co-op and now, every Wednesday morning, from 8:30 until 11:45, my kids are with other teachers. They do art every week. I am so excited to have all these cool art projects to collect now!! They have a fun science class with a teacher who is excited about science. They have a challenging writing class and have assignments that I can help with and not have to worry about grading. And I get to see them in a classroom setting and see how polite and respectful they are and watch them raise their hands and answer questions correctly. And honestly, I get a little teary-eyed. I am so proud and so relieved that they're turning out okay. Somehow, in spite of all my inadequacies and fears and laziness and mistakes, they're doing really well.
It gives me confidence for the future. It helps me enjoy our time together at home. Just that one morning one day a week seems to fill the void perfectly and brings balance to our homeschool schedule.
I have lamented the fact that I don't get a parent-teacher conference with my kids. I am both the parent and the teacher so I don't get a pat on the back or hear what my child needs to work on; I only have my opinion to go by and frankly, I'm biased. Although I think sometimes I'm even more critical than a teacher would be.
I've also lamented the fact that my kids don't get to tell me about their day. I'm there with them. They don't get to bring home papers or art projects to show me.
But this year - we joined our local homeschool co-op and now, every Wednesday morning, from 8:30 until 11:45, my kids are with other teachers. They do art every week. I am so excited to have all these cool art projects to collect now!! They have a fun science class with a teacher who is excited about science. They have a challenging writing class and have assignments that I can help with and not have to worry about grading. And I get to see them in a classroom setting and see how polite and respectful they are and watch them raise their hands and answer questions correctly. And honestly, I get a little teary-eyed. I am so proud and so relieved that they're turning out okay. Somehow, in spite of all my inadequacies and fears and laziness and mistakes, they're doing really well.
It gives me confidence for the future. It helps me enjoy our time together at home. Just that one morning one day a week seems to fill the void perfectly and brings balance to our homeschool schedule.
Wednesday, September 1, 2010
Now THIS is why I homeschool
* starting our school year when I was ready to start, which happened to be a week before our public schools started.
* taking off after a half day of school today to go swimming
*making up the half day after we got back from swimming
* watching my daughter begin to DEVOUR books - and knowing it's because of me that she can read. (and now I'm wondering where on earth we will put more books)
* telling my son that if he wanted to go camping with his grandpa and grandma, he'd have to do extra school work before he left and then I got to watch in amazement as he finished a whole weeks worth of work in 3 days!!
I know it's not for everyone. But in just 3 days, I've been reminded of why we have chosen this at this stage in our life. And I have no regrets.
* taking off after a half day of school today to go swimming
*making up the half day after we got back from swimming
* watching my daughter begin to DEVOUR books - and knowing it's because of me that she can read. (and now I'm wondering where on earth we will put more books)
* telling my son that if he wanted to go camping with his grandpa and grandma, he'd have to do extra school work before he left and then I got to watch in amazement as he finished a whole weeks worth of work in 3 days!!
I know it's not for everyone. But in just 3 days, I've been reminded of why we have chosen this at this stage in our life. And I have no regrets.
Monday, August 9, 2010
Small town 4th of July
Owen and Rachel waving the red, white and blue Owen, please don't put it up your nose
Brendan also showing his patriotism
Who is that riding in the parade?
.
Grandpa Lee! Our Citizen of the Year! 
I love everything about a small town 4th of July.
Brendan also showing his patriotism Who is that riding in the parade?.
Grandpa Lee! Our Citizen of the Year! And yes, he may have thrown an extra handful of candy
at some special parade spectators.
I love everything about a small town 4th of July.
Tuesday, August 3, 2010
My little tractor boy
I'm not sure how this happened but I have a wanna-be farmer. Not that we're city folk or anything like that. Josh and I both grew up around farms. My grandpa and uncles were farmers for years. But my little Owen didn't know that and wasn't around that. Last summer, he became a bit obsessed with my Uncle C.R.'s John Deere tractor when we were up at his resort.
The obsession has continued. And we have fueled it. But to be honest, I'm not sure we could have contained it. I wonder how long it will last?
Both our parents live in a small town in rural mid-Michigan surrounded by farms. After we get off the highway, we drive for about 20 minutes on country roads surrounded by farmland. Owen's favorite game to play during this drive is "find the John Deere tractor". It's a fun game to play and gets more challenging as the corn gets taller. Oh, and to see an actual tractor working in an actual field is a dream come true.
So, this year on vacation, Owen was Uncle C.R.'s little buddy. He saved him a seat at every meal. He searched for him and followed him around, talking about tractors. And then, at the end of the week, this was his reward.
Oh, yes, he's even steering it. And a little video of his tractor-driving action (because I knew he'd want to re-live this moment again and again) : This boy was in tractor heaven!
The obsession has continued. And we have fueled it. But to be honest, I'm not sure we could have contained it. I wonder how long it will last?
Both our parents live in a small town in rural mid-Michigan surrounded by farms. After we get off the highway, we drive for about 20 minutes on country roads surrounded by farmland. Owen's favorite game to play during this drive is "find the John Deere tractor". It's a fun game to play and gets more challenging as the corn gets taller. Oh, and to see an actual tractor working in an actual field is a dream come true.
So, this year on vacation, Owen was Uncle C.R.'s little buddy. He saved him a seat at every meal. He searched for him and followed him around, talking about tractors. And then, at the end of the week, this was his reward.
Oh, yes, he's even steering it. And a little video of his tractor-driving action (because I knew he'd want to re-live this moment again and again) : This boy was in tractor heaven!
Tuesday, July 13, 2010
Redemption
After hitting a low point a couple of weeks ago, I had to send Brendan away to camp again. This time it was to a church camp about 50 minutes away. It was so different from the last camp. At this one, we had all the correct information. We knew where to go and what he needed to take. There were several boys and girls there from our church so he was surrounded by people he knew. We left him with a light heart.
We picked him on Saturday morning (on time and in the right place - again) and he was full of smiles and stories. Non-stop stories. My goodness, that boy can talk.
The highlight was that we had surprised him and sent him a card while he was there. They have mail call every day and he never expected to get one. He said he didn't know I knew I could write to him. :) It was a last minute decision but I'm so glad I did it. I wish I had thought of it when Tori was there. I didn't say much but he knew we were thinking of him and missing him and that we loved him. I think it helped make up for letting him down before.
We picked him on Saturday morning (on time and in the right place - again) and he was full of smiles and stories. Non-stop stories. My goodness, that boy can talk.
The highlight was that we had surprised him and sent him a card while he was there. They have mail call every day and he never expected to get one. He said he didn't know I knew I could write to him. :) It was a last minute decision but I'm so glad I did it. I wish I had thought of it when Tori was there. I didn't say much but he knew we were thinking of him and missing him and that we loved him. I think it helped make up for letting him down before.
Thursday, July 1, 2010
Water on a hot day
A sparkling water fountain on a hot sunny day . . . just how wet will they get?
Barrett is thinking that water looks pretty good . . .
and laughs with glee as he feels the spray.
Rachel just wants to touch - but not get too close.
And then there's Owen - who tried to get as wet as he could.
Tuesday, June 29, 2010
40 years
My parents celebrated their 40th wedding anniversary this past weekend. They often celebrate their anniversary by going to The Bavarian Inn in Frankenmuth. This year, they wanted all of us to celebrate with them and we happily obliged!
A program from the restaurant showing the reservations for the day
There we are - in the Geneva room
I didn't take any pictures of the meal but we were well fed and enjoyed a family-style fried chicken dinner. It was wonderful having a private room and not having to worry about the little ones so much.
Happy Anniversary, mom and dad!
Sunday, June 27, 2010
A low moment
I hit a low as a mom the other day. I let Brendan down in a big way. And the pain of that hit me so hard, it took me a couple of days to recover.
I know I'm not perfect. I was never under that illusion. And I know my kids know I'm not perfect. I get angry, I make mistakes. But I think this may have been the first time that one of them was really counting on me and I blew it.
Brendan went to the overnight basketball camp at Spring Arbor University last week. Josh took him over there on Sunday afternoon for check in. It was hard letting him go. He didn't know anyone else there and he would be staying overnight until Thursday. He had a key to his room and had to keep track of that. There was a lot more freedom and responsibilty than he's had before.
Check-in did not go entirely smoothly. I feel the need to explain some things, while at the same time not excusing what happened. I sent the registration in for the camp, along with the deposit money, at the beginning of May. We never received any confirmation that he was signed up so I called last week and was told yes, they had his name down. We looked on-line to see where they needed to go to check-in and the only thing we could find was a map on the brochure on-line that had the fieldhouse circled so Josh took him there. He called me at 3:20 (check-in was from 3-5) and said there were tables set up but no one was there. I looked on-line again and could find no other information. He decided to drive around and saw people going in one of the dorms. Sure enough, that was where they needed to be.
Monday night, we went over to see one of the games. It had said on-line that parents could visit the camp at any time and that there would also be an awards ceremony at the end of camp. The only thing on the brochure said that check-out was at 1:00 pm on Thursday. I asked Brendan that night if they had said anything about the awards ceremony and he said no. I went over to a table that had schedules posted on it and it said camp ended at 12:00 on Thursday. I wondered if the awards ceremony would be then but also thought that was lunch time so I figured they'd eat lunch and then come back for the awards and check-out. Since it wasn't explicitly stated that way, I thought I should ask someone. But I didn't. When we were leaving, Josh told Brendan he'd come back Wednesday to watch him play so I thought I'd have Josh ask someone then. But I didn't.
Thursday morning came and I was really looking forward to getting Brendan and bringing him home. I wondered if I should go over early to see what was going on, just in case the awards program was early, but I also had the other kids with me and convinced myself that it would be at 1:00 because that was the only information that had been sent home.
I don't think I'd make a good mystery writer because I'm pretty sure you can see where this is going.
I loaded up the kids around 12:40 on Thursday and drove to Spring Arbor. I went to the fieldhouse first and no one was there. Then I realized that I didn't know what dorm he was in. I called Josh and figured out where it was after driving for a few minutes. I walked in the dorm with just my keys and the kids and realized I didn't know what room he was in. We walked through some halls and finally I found someone to ask and they pointed us to the third floor. I saw someone coming out of a room and asked if he knew where Brendan Hall was and he said, "Oh, Brendan, here she is." Brendan came out with his eyes a little red and just said, "Where were you? You missed the awards." He was one of the last ones to get picked up and had been waiting for about an hour. The awards had been at noon and then the campers were free to leave - there was no lunch that day.
Can you say "ouch"? My heart still hurts a little thinking about it.
I apologized and explained to him how I had been trying to find him and how I had thought the awards were at 1:00. He got over it pretty quick - I think he was just relieved that someone was finally there to pick him up and take him home. It's taken me a couple days to process it and be able to think about without tears. I think what really hurts is knowing that is just the first of many times that I will disappoint him. That even with all my good intentions, there are times I will just screw up and hurt him.
He seems to have recovered with no major scars. He had a great time at camp and talks about it all the time and just casually mentions that I was late picking him up. I cringe but I'm working on it. I realized two days later that as I was walking the dorm looking for him, there were two young boys sitting there waiting for their ride. So I wasn't the only one who didn't get there for the awards. That helped a little.
I want to tell my kids that they can always count on me but there are times when that isn't true. I don't want it to be like that and I will do my best to be there (next time I will ask questions) but I am human and I make mistakes. Now I get to teach them about grace and forgiveness and also about One who they can always count on. I guess that lesson is worth the pain.
I know I'm not perfect. I was never under that illusion. And I know my kids know I'm not perfect. I get angry, I make mistakes. But I think this may have been the first time that one of them was really counting on me and I blew it.
Brendan went to the overnight basketball camp at Spring Arbor University last week. Josh took him over there on Sunday afternoon for check in. It was hard letting him go. He didn't know anyone else there and he would be staying overnight until Thursday. He had a key to his room and had to keep track of that. There was a lot more freedom and responsibilty than he's had before.
Check-in did not go entirely smoothly. I feel the need to explain some things, while at the same time not excusing what happened. I sent the registration in for the camp, along with the deposit money, at the beginning of May. We never received any confirmation that he was signed up so I called last week and was told yes, they had his name down. We looked on-line to see where they needed to go to check-in and the only thing we could find was a map on the brochure on-line that had the fieldhouse circled so Josh took him there. He called me at 3:20 (check-in was from 3-5) and said there were tables set up but no one was there. I looked on-line again and could find no other information. He decided to drive around and saw people going in one of the dorms. Sure enough, that was where they needed to be.
Monday night, we went over to see one of the games. It had said on-line that parents could visit the camp at any time and that there would also be an awards ceremony at the end of camp. The only thing on the brochure said that check-out was at 1:00 pm on Thursday. I asked Brendan that night if they had said anything about the awards ceremony and he said no. I went over to a table that had schedules posted on it and it said camp ended at 12:00 on Thursday. I wondered if the awards ceremony would be then but also thought that was lunch time so I figured they'd eat lunch and then come back for the awards and check-out. Since it wasn't explicitly stated that way, I thought I should ask someone. But I didn't. When we were leaving, Josh told Brendan he'd come back Wednesday to watch him play so I thought I'd have Josh ask someone then. But I didn't.
Thursday morning came and I was really looking forward to getting Brendan and bringing him home. I wondered if I should go over early to see what was going on, just in case the awards program was early, but I also had the other kids with me and convinced myself that it would be at 1:00 because that was the only information that had been sent home.
I don't think I'd make a good mystery writer because I'm pretty sure you can see where this is going.
I loaded up the kids around 12:40 on Thursday and drove to Spring Arbor. I went to the fieldhouse first and no one was there. Then I realized that I didn't know what dorm he was in. I called Josh and figured out where it was after driving for a few minutes. I walked in the dorm with just my keys and the kids and realized I didn't know what room he was in. We walked through some halls and finally I found someone to ask and they pointed us to the third floor. I saw someone coming out of a room and asked if he knew where Brendan Hall was and he said, "Oh, Brendan, here she is." Brendan came out with his eyes a little red and just said, "Where were you? You missed the awards." He was one of the last ones to get picked up and had been waiting for about an hour. The awards had been at noon and then the campers were free to leave - there was no lunch that day.
Can you say "ouch"? My heart still hurts a little thinking about it.
I apologized and explained to him how I had been trying to find him and how I had thought the awards were at 1:00. He got over it pretty quick - I think he was just relieved that someone was finally there to pick him up and take him home. It's taken me a couple days to process it and be able to think about without tears. I think what really hurts is knowing that is just the first of many times that I will disappoint him. That even with all my good intentions, there are times I will just screw up and hurt him.
He seems to have recovered with no major scars. He had a great time at camp and talks about it all the time and just casually mentions that I was late picking him up. I cringe but I'm working on it. I realized two days later that as I was walking the dorm looking for him, there were two young boys sitting there waiting for their ride. So I wasn't the only one who didn't get there for the awards. That helped a little.
I want to tell my kids that they can always count on me but there are times when that isn't true. I don't want it to be like that and I will do my best to be there (next time I will ask questions) but I am human and I make mistakes. Now I get to teach them about grace and forgiveness and also about One who they can always count on. I guess that lesson is worth the pain.
Thursday, June 17, 2010
To sell or not to sell?
Actually, that should be "To list or not to list?" because the real question isn't about selling our home - we can't control that. The real question is if we want to keep it listed and have the option of selling it.
I know this will come as no surprise, but I go back and forth about this. Since we've had our house on the market for over a year now, we decided to stop putting off doing some things. Like getting a new swingset. Putting in a new adjustable basketball hoop. Just things that we didn't do last year because we didn't want to invest more into this house if we were just going to be leaving. Now we're realizing that this might be our home for longer than we originally thought and we're trying to make the best of it. Utilizing our outdoor space is definitely one way to do that! We're also planning on putting in new windows and re-doing the kids rooms upstairs later this summer or early fall.
At one time, we thought we'd take it off the market for 2-3 years and make these changes and save up money. Then we thought maybe we'd leave it on while making these changes. Yes, showings can be a pain but there haven't been many of those. Then we talked about taking it off the market for a couple months and possibly putting it back on.
The verdict? Still don't know. {grin} We'll see what the situation is in August and I'm sure I'll be bringing up the pros and cons to Josh many times until then! I can say this with certainty - I am learning to be more flexible and to not get attached to how I think things should be. And what is the point of living life if you're never learning anything new?
I know this will come as no surprise, but I go back and forth about this. Since we've had our house on the market for over a year now, we decided to stop putting off doing some things. Like getting a new swingset. Putting in a new adjustable basketball hoop. Just things that we didn't do last year because we didn't want to invest more into this house if we were just going to be leaving. Now we're realizing that this might be our home for longer than we originally thought and we're trying to make the best of it. Utilizing our outdoor space is definitely one way to do that! We're also planning on putting in new windows and re-doing the kids rooms upstairs later this summer or early fall.
At one time, we thought we'd take it off the market for 2-3 years and make these changes and save up money. Then we thought maybe we'd leave it on while making these changes. Yes, showings can be a pain but there haven't been many of those. Then we talked about taking it off the market for a couple months and possibly putting it back on.
The verdict? Still don't know. {grin} We'll see what the situation is in August and I'm sure I'll be bringing up the pros and cons to Josh many times until then! I can say this with certainty - I am learning to be more flexible and to not get attached to how I think things should be. And what is the point of living life if you're never learning anything new?
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