Thursday, September 6, 2012

Promises, promises

I know, I've let you down.  You don't have to say it.  I can tell by the look in your eyes.  I said last time I would write more about my marathon experience and I talked about how we had an offer on our house and had to move but didn't know where we were moving and then what do I do?  I leave you hanging all summer.  And now, it's September and I'm finally back and you know what?  I'm not going to talk about either of those.  Not just yet. 

We started back to school last Monday.  For us, that meant getting up around a regular time (except for Brendan - that boy learned to sleep this summer!  So I had to wake him up at 9:30 - rough life, I know), eating breakfast, and doing some math and grammar before playing.  No big deal.  I bought some new curriculum this year and was excited about starting out.  Mostly.  It was nice this summer not having to think about it but I did feel ready for a routine and a plan to our day. 

This was how our day started:  I did spelling and grammar with Tori and the new books were great.  Rachel and Owen came down about 5 times in 20 minutes asking if I was done yet and if I could do school with them.  Brendan finally came down and I got him going on grammar and vocabulary.  I started math with Tori and a few minutes later, Brendan was ready for math.  I went over his math lesson and then went back to Tori, who needed more help.  I went up to work with Rachel and Owen and they decided that learning to read was boring and practicing writing letters and numbers was even more boring.  But they didn't want to color or play with playdough - they wanted to do real school!  I have no idea what they were expecting exactly, but clearly I was not delivering!  At this point, Tori comes up with her math and is very frustrated and still not done.  And I am thinking, "Why do I do this?  How many more years of this do I have?" 

It has been a struggle this year for me.  For the very first time (I swear, this is true), I have felt envious of my friends posting about their kids going back to school.  I imagine the quiet house (I'd have all 4 of them gone!).  I imagine the work I could get done and the breaks I could take and the sense of accomplishment I'd have at the end of the day.  And oh, the grass looks so much greener over there. 

Then yesterday,we went to our homeschool co-op.  And this year, I have a new position there.  I am working in the accounting office.  At a computer.  On a desk.  Entering things in a computer.  Adding things up.  A cupboard full of office supplies.  I LOVE IT!!!!  I really should have majored in accounting.  It has actually made me think about the idea of getting a regular office job and sending the kids to school.  But yesterday, I talked to the other ladies in the office about how I was feeling.  And they totally understood and said they've been there before.  They both have older kids and some homeschool graduates and they shared some positives they have seen from homeschooling their kids and how they were so glad they stuck it out.  They talked about how they feel now that they are almost done - or at least closer than I am.  And there is some sadness that it's coming to an end for them. 

Today, our day went really well.  Tori's math wasn't even that painful.  We all had a great day together.  Among all the posts and status updates about how people are finding so much time to get things done with their kids gone, I read a post about finding time for projects during the season of homeschooling and it was exactly what I needed to read.  After turning down invitations to run or workout because of needing to be at home teaching my kids, all the kids seemed to really appreciate me being here today.  It just confirmed that this is the right choice for us right now.  And it's all going to go by so fast. 

It was definitely not the smoothest start to a school year.  But the waters are calming down and we're on the right path.  Now to just stay the course.  And I promise - I will not wait 3 months to write again and I *will* talk about the marathon and our new home.  Which I absolutely love.  Not to leave you hanging or anything. 

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